Where in the world is Andy Smith?

'A distinct lack of Andy` Here, in Heathcote Junction, this open space reflects the loss felt by the members of the MURP community

HEATHCOTE JUNCTION, Vic. (Groiters) - Saturday 20th March, 1999

Shock and concern rang through the MURP community today with the news that Andy Smith, lovable philosophy student and keen philanthropist, was missing.

Andy Smith has been a large part of the MURP community ever since his grandiose entrance in 1994, and news that he had been missing since early that morning has initiated a number of changes within the 70-strong roleplaying group.

Initial reactions varied from shock to rampant hysteria. Others tried to defend themselves from the reality of the situation, while others lost themselves in domestic tasks. Some of the close-knit community gathered to offer what comfort they could.

By midafternoon it was clear that this was not the simple confusion over navigation which Andy was famous for. Senior members of the community gathered together in a closed planning session to plan out a method of finding and retrieving Andy from the wilds of Victoria. When interviewed at a break in the proceedings, members of the planning committee declined to comment on any progress they may have made.

Andy Smith Ever since his arrival in the MURP community 5 years ago, Andy has been a integral member of this small, but active community. His history in MURP begins with an almost meteoric rise to the position of secretary in his first year with the group, and from that point he has always kept in contact with the senior members of the community. In 1995 Andy organised the highly sucessful Capricon V, returning the yearly market and social gathering to its former glories. The following year he returned to a private life, authoring the literary classic "Wook Master". In 1997 he returned to public life, becoming involved in the 'Unicon' project. It has been this selfless application to the community, and his boundless goodwill that has drawn him into the heart of MURP, and has made his disappearance into such a devastating event.

Outside of the council chambers, concerned members of the community were gathering to voice their own solutions or simply to wait for whatever hope could be given up to them. The atmosphere was tense, but hopeful - on several other occasions, Andy had been lost, but returned safely having mistakenly returned to Richmond instead of Doncaster, travelled to Carnegie attempting to get to Mount Waverley, or simply having confused one month with another.

However, some members of the community were not content to sit idly by. Ken Blakey, made famous for his 'fucking stairs' stance within the club, spoke to us saying "I originally thought he might have been in the sink, but in hindsight that was a foolish notion. I think the time has come for some serious action." In a startling revelation, Mr Blakey revealed that he was in fact a member of the MURP secret police and set about obtaining assistance by phone. "I did not feel that it was appropriate to reveal my association in the normal course of matters, but Andy's loss is simply to great a blow to the community".

Shortly before dusk, the planning committee had drawn up a number of proposed plans for the search and rescue missions. Speaking to the gathered crowd, a spokesman revealed the multi-pronged attacks.

1. Specially trained tracking possums would be released come nightfall. These possums had been trained to detect the melodic stains of the harmonica, and from there to zero in on Andy.
2. Commando-like groups of MURP members, rigorously trained on modern equipment would be lead in a spiral search pattern, starting from Clayton and moving out in an effort to establish a direction that Andy may have travelled.
3. A walkathon come doorknocking program, intended to spread the news throughout the public that Andy was missing, and attempting to raise funds in order to continue the search.
4. Some MURP community members were asked to help out by using their own vehicles to scour the landscape for any signs of Andy. These members were strictly chosen on a volunteer basis, as they would be dicing with danger by performing the search.
5. Spirits of the air and the land were to be raised and sent forth to reveal what they could of his travels.
6. Finally, viewing stations were to be constructed high atop mountains to give the best view of the surrounds, both to continue the visual search from near the campsite and also to retransmit any signals given by the other search parties.

The search briefing lasted only one hour, but at the end of it hope had been restored to these people, and it was with a light heart that they moved off to their assigned tasks, one ear cocked for the clattering sound of Andy's engine, knowing that he should soon be restored to them.